Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Rabbit Hole Day

I had the most fantastic day!

My husband sat down with me this morning while I was painting my toenails.

"Honey," he said, "I'm sorry, but I just don't believe you.  You're an established night owl.  You oversleep every morning and you're always late.  Right now you should be sprinting through the place throwing on mismatched clothes and taking off without your phone."

“Awww,” I intoned.  “You’re just the bestest husband ever!” I exclaimed.  “I can’t wait to go to bed tonight...”  I breathed.

He grimaced and shook his head.  “Honey, that is really distracting.  Just say it, OK, dear?”

At my usual lunch place I ordered a heavenly soft, buttery cloud of an orange muffin stuffed with bursting juice-jewel cranberries.

Stu-the-Cashier smiled down at me and said, "Dial it back, kid.

“Also,” he said, “you know your hair doesn't need to be so tediously shiny and thick and silky and flowing.  Lustrous would be just fine."

I thanked him until he shooed me on my way.

At work my boss called me in to his office.  He asked me to close the door behind him.

"So Kate, we need to discuss a few items.  For starters, I understand you're expecting a promotion."

"Yes sir, I believe we'd all be best served if you make me the surprise choice to head up the MacGuffin Project.  It would inspire my friends to rally 'round me, and my rivals to hatch insidious plans to humiliate me.  They would go a little too far and inadvertently create a massive crisis that would require me to set aside my personal demons and save the world."

"I see,” he said.  “The problem is that you started here as the plucky temp who caused a brown-out attempting to operate the coffee maker.  According to my records, that was... Monday."  He pressed his fingertips together and frowned.  "You see the problem, Kate.”

Then he cleared his throat.  "And that brings me to the second item," he continued.  "For four hours yesterday your name was Stephanie."

I tell you, I’m just so lucky to have these people!


  1. I was slightly bemused at first but by the end I was laughing out loud. Brilliant!

  2. Hi!

    Oh Excellent!!


    I tried not to laugh out too loudly though as I'm here being all efficient at work...!!

    p.s. Lovely blog btw - is that really a cat on top of a door? Wow!

    Take care and happy rabbit hole day too


  3. You've inspired me. Next Rabbit Hole Day, I'm having my hair done all luscious and painting my toenails. Sounds like such fun. And your cat is soooooooo cute.

  4. But did you ejaculate impressively and miraculously charm the portly old fuddy-duddy with your rapier wit, thus causing him to give you the promotion anyway?


  5. Thanks everyone, and Happy Rabbit Hole day to the lot of you!

    Thanks fairyhedgehog for bringing this to our attention. It's been great fun writing this and reading every one else's posts.

    And maybe genius, why yes, that's EXACTLY what happened next!

  6. Tremendously amusing. I love how calm and sensible the boss is.

  7. Oh and I once had a cat who slept on top of the door.